Psychologist on hiatus

I am officially on hiatus. I have submitted my thesis and never want to see it again. In reality, I probably will see it again when the time for emmendations comes in a few months. I will also need to write a couple of papers and present at a conference in October but apart from that, I am done. Im also done-in.

Travel is coming as a very welcome reprieve not necessarily from psychology, but from university at least. I dont think I can escape psychology now that I have been "psychologised." I say it like I have been "brutalised." I haven't. There are just the normal hazards of accepting the cons with the pros, the Yokos with the Johns, the hangovers with the champagne, the Starbucks with the "only place open that serves coffee."

Others in the profession may similarly curse the day they learnt of personality disorders, the day they uncovered their own deep and painful core beliefs, the day they realised whole-heartedly that the world is not fair, the day they wondered how they would possibly be able to bring up kids in the minefield that is life before them, and the day they realised having a "good day" sometimes meant no one got considerably worse.

If you can get through all that without offending friends and loved ones because you dont always say the right thing, or because you dont want to talk or listen to anyone once home, you're doing alright. If you can get through that without being paranoid about pathologising instead of realising that most facets or life are too complicated to be boxed in any way, without hearing the words "you should have handled that better- you're a psychologist," and without neglecting to find the necessary time and inclination to continually work on your own "stuff," you're doing well. Really well.

I hope the time away will be a chance to work on my own "stuff," a chance to meet weird and wonderful people and a chance to experience a true sense of independence. I dont mean economic independence, I mean the chance to get to know the world, to take my time with it, to feel all the ups and downs and get through them with my own resources, off my own bat. I want to dishelve expectation, mostly my own. I want to be a visitor. I have no unrealistic expectation of getting to know the world without giving something to it. What that is, Im not yet sure. But I have to be open to anything.

I read somewhere... be careful what you wish for- you might just get it. Right now I wish for the hot sticky air of Thailand, the colourful and aromatic markets of India, the warm and comforting feel of Christmas in France and the rushed, cant-stop-to-even-take-a-breath chatter of my sister. Hmm, I better be careful what I wish for.